Communism: The Flawless Path to Utopia and Equality
Dispelling Myths: Embracing the Lessons of Cuba, the USSR, and North Korea
As whispers of communism float through the hallowed halls of the Democratic Party, it's high time we take a closer look at the system that's had a flawless track record throughout history. After all, what better way to improve the world than by following in the footsteps of such paradises as Cuba, the USSR, and North Korea? Let’s take apart the brainwashing from the patriarchy and look at cold, hard facts. Take two seconds and shed your bigoted brain.
First up, Cuba. This island nation is not just famous for its cigars and rum, but also its unique ability to make capitalist systems green with envy. Who wouldn't want to live in a place where the government so generously rations out necessities? It's the perfect way to ensure an equal distribution of goods, while also fostering a strong sense of community. After all, there's nothing like bonding with your neighbors with song, dance, and love for how your taxes are used. Homeless aren’t dancing in joy in the US.
Now let's turn our attention to the former USSR, the communist juggernaut that redefined the meaning of equality. Five-year plans might have been their bread and butter, but the USSR was also a shining beacon of technological innovation. They made it to space before the US, and we all know that's the only accomplishment that really matters. Sure, the USSR may have crumbled like a delicate meringue, but that’s because capitalistic attacks from the US during the Cold War sham. It still doesn't diminish the unparalleled success of their unique brand of communism.
Last, but certainly not least, we have the hermit kingdom of North Korea. Who could resist the charm of a country that's as self-reliant as it is secretive? While the rest of the world squabbles over petty matters like global warming, school shootings, and Trump being arrested, North Korea remains steadfast in its dedication to its success. Now that's what we call loyalty. We need more loyalty to human kind and inclusivity.
In contrast, capitalism and democracy have left countless people struggling in the dust. The rich keep getting richer, while the rest of us are left to fight over the scraps. And let's not even get started on the so-called "freedom" of choice that comes with a capitalist society. Who has the time or energy to decide between 27 brands of toothpaste? A communist utopia would streamline our lives, freeing us from the tyranny of endless options. Capitalism oppresses minorities and pretends to help them by providing 103 different crutches while simultaneously breaks their legs.
So if the Democrats are harboring a secret communist agenda, we say, "Bring it on!" It's about time we embraced the unparalleled success of communism and left the oppressive and racist world of capitalism and democracy behind. As history has shown time and time again, communism is the one and only path to true happiness and equality. And if you disagree, well, you probably worship Donald Trump, Q, and think the Earth is flat.
You are correct. Every one of those countries streamlined and removed choices for their population to ensure an equal and balanced distribution of what the government wanted for the people. This includes the execution of gays to maintain a society conducive to growth. Are you sure you want to glorify that?